A thing I wrote for work.......very inside-y joke

Velox Slump Administration

Finding and Curing the Slump

Slumpmin^® - The revolutionary cure for S.A.P (Slump After Passivation)

If you are experiencing symptoms such as unexplained yield loss, failure to meet HTRB and THB criteria, you may be suffering from S.A.P. Slumpmin^® is the first and only prescription developed specifically for S.A.P. Slumpmin^® improves moisture barrier under high stress conditions and automatically increases the yield by changing the epi material.

Studies have shown that Slumpmin^® can reduce the slump, upto 90% in QF and Eng clinical trials. It can reduce yield loss, increase greater chance of HTRB and in some cases shown to withstand THB testing. Please consult your Process Engineer and ask if this is suitable for you.

Warning: Slumpmin^® may not work in all DOE or Validation Trials. Please do not take Slumpmin^® if you are going to be operating under deadlines as it could result in increased heart rate and headaches. If you are suffering from unreliable Schottky Metal or are currently taking medications from Thin Films this may not be suitable for you. Slumpmin^® should not be taken by patients who have recently suffered great yield loss in a DOE or a Validation Trial. Side effects may include bubbles, cracks, measles, temporary resolution of yield loss and euphoria. Avoid operating the PECVD or the Polyimide for 12 hours if you have recently taken a dose of Slumpmin^®.